Nothing is permanent

[Yvonne]

[Cobwebby]

Thanks I like this. It helps and has been demonstrated in my life.
I may ask my daughter (the artist) to make a small drawing to illustrate this concept for me to remember each day.
It also adds great meaning to seize the moment when good times abound.

[Cobwebby]

I'm posting this for two reasons
1. I thought it would be fun to see my name all the way down the line
and
2. this has been a very stressful day. My elderly mother snapped her femur while on an 'outing' . She is old and very fragile and is currently being transported to Shock Trauma. Consults with the docs have been intense because a course of action is not so clear cut. Unfortunately I think this is her ticket into a nursing home. Either that- and I'll voice it here, because I don't dare say it out loud to friends, I hope she dies before a life of suffering takes over.

Nothing and nobody is permanent.

[Yvonne]

I'm sorry for your mother. I hope it's not too grave

Unfortunately I think this is her ticket into a nursing home. Either that- and I'll voice it here, because I don't dare say it out loud to friends, I hope she dies before a life of suffering takes over.

I can understand that you say this when it really becomes suffering.
My mother spent the last 4 years as Alzheimer's patient in a nursing home
The last two years she could not walk anymore or talk normally.
She was often sick, had often require antibiotics and then it became more suffering
Yet she smiled a lot.Mijn mother was always a sweet and easy to please woman

Best wishes for your mother

[Cobwebby]

Thanks yvonne- stopped to use a friends computer on my way to hospital-she is on the 'neuro trauma' unit.
Considering 'end of life' issues has me traveling back through my life with her -mostly the funny situations we got into. It is really hard.

[Claudia]

Cobby.

I am sorry to read about your mother's accident. This type of situation is so awful for all concerned. I hope the outcome is the best that can be expected. So sorry.

[Cobwebby]

Yesterday was intense. My daughter and I spent the day with my mother in the hospital-waiting for the results of various tests to see if she was even a candidate for surgery.
She didn't exactly pass the test with flying colors, and normally they would probably not suggest surgery-BUT my mother is very alert and bright with all her faculties intact- and they did not want to confine her to a life in bed.
So they are willing to attempt the surgery as long as we all know the risks involved. Ultimately of course it is Mom's decision. She is aware of the risks-mostly that her heart will not tolerate the hours of surgery and she has chosen not to be rescusitated at any time -either during the operation or after.
Her surgery is today. The hospital has advised us not to come down yet since we will not have access to her until much later in the day. I personally am in agreemnent with that. Hospitals put me in the Twilight Zone.
But my husband has elected to go down and wait. I know I would get too strung out.

What has surprised me is that when people in the past have asked me if I would be sad when Mom dies. I always said NO. Death was just a part of living and she has lived her life. But when faced with the immediate possiblity of it I sobbed. So the sadness surprised me. I would like to add here that Mom was the only family member who never questioned my Lyme Disease diagnosis and all it's ramifications. Of course she was not dependent on me the way my kids and husband were. They had little patience. She , however, was sympathetic.

Yesterday was intense- but it was one of the best days I have had with Mom interms of 'connecting' with memories and reminiscing , sharing and discussing end of life issues.